Before I venture out into the new year with buckets of feed, I want to wish each and every reader and Nuke, no2liberals, and Robert D Happy New Year, with the wish that all y’all have a happy, healthy, and rewarding year to come.
Now, on to those New Year’s resolutions. Hmmmm. Let me see, what should be first on my list? It should probably be achievable, which probably means I should cross out doing the P90X workout every single day until I have a slim, trim, toned hourglass figure. Riiiiiight. I have time fitting in a shower on some days. Plus I don’t actually HAVE the P90X workout on account of I don’t spend money on me, and SwampMan wisely refrained from giving me anything that would give the barest hint that maybe I am not absolutely perfect just the way I am. Okay. Maybe my resolution will be to achieve a beer keg figure this year. I think I can do it!
I would like to resolve that I will no longer be savagely bitten at work (ruefully rubbing left forearm where the underlying flesh is still crushed and painful after two weeks), but……that ain’t gonna happen unless I don’t go to work anymore. Hmmmmm. Sounds like a resolution to me! *sigh* SwampMan says NO, I cannot have a I’m Not Going To Work Ever Again resolution. Okay, fine. I resolve that I’m going to change careers this year. (Checking with SwampMan….SwampMan says a career change is a good goal.) Is beach bum a career?
Well, my resolution list is almost complete. I’m going to be a keg-shaped beach bum. I could probably collect money from beach businesses to NOT wear skimpy bathing suits at the beach and scare the tourists away and/or make them swear off food and drink. Sounds like a new business opportunity! I could wear signs saying “I got this body from exercising at __________ and eating at ______________” until they pay me to take their name off. Could be REALLY lucrative.
Here’s hoping that all your dreams are achievable, too!
Filed under: Life in Florida