So, New Year’s Resolutions Come Three Weeks Behind Schedule


In the spirit of “Loyal Opposition My [redacted],” I would like to offer y’all some cheer for the upcoming inauguration. Yes, we thought that the gag-worthy Obamessiah Adoration would be over after the election, but it seems to have increased in frequency – much like a teenage boy, whom, having finally gotten laid, is not calm and satisfied, but wants more – and more – and more.

At any rate, there are some silver linings in all this. Thanks to Glenn Beck, there’s a theme song for Tuesday’s festivities.

The top New Year’s Resolution – to lose weight – has not been a paragon of success – until now. Who can deny that the idolatry of Obama is nauseating? Who hasn’t lost her appetite (yes, even for things made out of chocolate) while watching the media-love-fest, which puts baby-talking teenagers who sit on each other’s laps to shame? Who hasn’t thrown up, if even in their mouths, if even a little, in the past few months? Fear not, dear readers: weight loss just got easier. Move over, small portions and blue plates! Obama is the New South Beach Diet.

The New York Times is running out of money – fast. Apparently, people don’t want to buy the paper that sent Maureen Dowd on a fact-finding mission to Alaska that was reminiscent of Joe Wilson’s “fact-finding” mission to Nigeria.

The pundits are already pointing out that Obama cannot possibly deliver on all of his promises. (Granted, we wish they had said so in October, but ’tis the nature of the modern media.) This allows plenty of opportunity to say “I told you so” and the like.

Americans who are abroad and are ashamed of being from this country are feeling the love from foreigners. Silver lining: those unpatriotic, thankless pansywaists are more likely to stay abroad.

Sorry for the rant (sort of!) – but I figured that y’all have to be more than a little tired of the love-fest.

3 Responses

  1. It’s good to rant, sometimes.
    As for being sick and tired of the love crush-fest, it really hasn’t effected me. I just ignore it, and refuse to participate in it. I just hit the remote or presets whenever his voice or a story about him come up. The printed word is fine, though, it doesn’t have quite the same impact.

  2. Losing your appetite for chocolate?
    Dang. This is getting serious

  3. Yep. Every time a news program comes up with a mention of Obama, I click the channel.

    Come to think of it, I haven’t watched the news now for awhile.

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